Have you ever asked “Why me?” or maybe why my family, or why my child, or why that nice person over there? Have you ever wondered why that bad thing happened to you? Do you ever feel like a black cloud is over your head and anything that could go wrong does? That seems to be part of human nature – to think we deserve better.
But when something great happens do you ever ask “Why me?” Why was I fortunate enough to have something awesome and wonderful happen in my life or to my family? Or do we just take it for granted that we deserved this awesome thing in our lives more than someone else?
Why do we do this? Why do we think we are being punished with bad things and deserve the good things? Research shows that there are many benefits to being a positive person. For instance, focusing on the good leads to a longer life, increases your chances of success, improves your relationships, and improves decision making, just to name a few. Yet, many of us have a hard time being positive people.
Philippians 4:8 says “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” This is exactly what the secular research is saying – the best way to live is to focus on the positive – not the negative.
There are so many little things that we can do to be more positive. But for many of us it doesn’t come naturally – it has to be an intentional change in behavior. A little thing like a smile releases endorphins and serotonin – the hormones that help us feel good. Taking a moment to notice the beautiful flowers on the way to work can help with a positive mindset. Jotting down one small positive thing each day in a notebook gives us record to look back on as a reminder that life is good. Positive people take responsibility for their own actions and don’t blame others. They also tend to do less complaining than negative people. Forcing ourselves to look for something positive amid the storms of life trains our minds to focus on the positive not the negative.
So the next time you find yourself asking “why me?” or sensing that black cloud over your head force yourself to think about the things that are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, praiseworthy.